Clint failed as a New York novelist. He returns to his hometown of Fort Chicken, Illinois. He lives in his mom’s guest house and works as a substitute teacher at the elementary school. Just hours into his first day, the kids become infected with a highly contagious virus turning them into savage, flesh-eating monsters; trapping Clint and a motley crew of teachers in the school.
At a glance, Cooties looks like a bad movie. The trailer is silly. The title sounds like it should be about lice and the premise as a horror-comedy is a tough sell. That said, Cooties has some charm. the cast is well-known and the teacher characters are mostly the types you would never want teaching at your child’s school.
There are a few intense attacks with solid gore effects. Look for Seann William Scott in a brief cameo during some of the chaos. The jokes are hit or miss but most of them are clever, even if they are not laugh-out-loud funny. The story turns into more of a horror movie after the first half but it stalls along the way. Staying interested through the entire movie might be difficult if you are not in the mood for some jokes mixed in with your horror.
The premise of child zombies attacking the teachers at a school is certainly original. It is gory enough to be considered a film for adults but probably not appropriate for kids.
Cooties should be mandatory viewing for any education major or anyone considering becoming a substitute in Baltimore. If you are looking for something a little different,there are better out there but it is not a bad way to kill 90 minutes.
TRT: 89 minutes
Final Cut 39 (78%)